Being Skandh
" Faith doesn't start after you see God....it starts after noticing that he saw you first "
These are the lines on a random post on the internet but stuck with me as if glued to my head, the post was about a famous deity in the land of AP but strangely all I could think of was Lord Skandha, in Tamil he is fondly called Kankanda Deivam - A deity who is seen by the human eyes...How true is the quote above Skandha comes into your life rather silently and most often the faith for me too did not start not because I saw him first but it was he who saw me first amongst the crores of people calling him, amongst the elaborate rituals being done for him, amongst the many riches and glory,
he chose this simple stubborn hearted girl who admonished and failed to believe in his presence , who was very much convinced that God doesn't exist he silently watched her smiling as it was not she who chose him but he who chose her and through the path he saw her mature , understand, grow, leave her old ideals, embrace new faith, embrace her name and blood and transform to his beloved bhaktha all this while he just watched silently showing his presence at moments of doubt as that passing photo on a bus , a vel on a car, a peacock sticker, a printed boarding, all the printed stickers with his names on the vehicles passing by, peacocks seen on train journeys, peacocks visit when she used to visit his temples and like that no sooner he was everywhere, the workplace she went, the auto she boarded, the shop she went, even the things she bought in everything there was his subtle presence from not seeing him anywhere to seeing him everywhere around her, she felt deep reverence in his unanimous presence that he is watching her at all times.....
Just as I write this a lizard makes a sound affirming my belief that he is still watching now too...
Many a times I have heard my close friend say your attitude is like him without their knowledge they say I resemble him in my attitude, demeanor and the way I walk the path in life and I just smile within shouldn't I embody the deity I pray to ? Wasn't that the main goal? The Purpose?
To Become the Deity One day ...
But being Skandh is not easy, you voice out every adharma and you take the burden of that too, you get hit and still not falter from your Dharma, you stay stubborn to protect your ideals, your always a mishap at home at workplace being that black sheep who refuses to fit in or obey mindless authority, wherever you go power is taken up by you than waiting for it , even the most highest authority when he weilds his power in front of you it doesn't make you flinch an eye in front of them making the opposite person confused and mad about what gives her this much confidence ? but there is clawing through the mud in every aspect of life , work,family,health,wealth, environment, circumstances everything tests you down to your limits leaving you completely broken, shattered, even the E in Ego can't exist the moment he sees that he will brutally remove it humbling you at every step for your own wellbeing. There is no choice for you but to stay Dharmic always at all times.
But that doesn't mean he is always fierce, he is loving the kind of love that will leave you in tears , at the most worst of moments he will hold you tight his embrace is something you can never describe but only experience, once he decides no matter what greatest wrong you may do he will still stay with you through it all his support is unwavering, unflinching,stubborn and Omnipresent..... That is Skandha...Murugan...The Commander of DevaLoka...and My Beloved Lord....
He doesn't want a perfect you...he will take the imperfect one and accept you as you are while also moulding you in the path, his path is like that one way dilapidated, abandoned road in every city the one which most avoid taking, it is a path of crossing comfort zones, being tested and still willing to show up and sometimes just plainly surrendering to his will.
When you understand the Deity's Life and the Problems he faced mostly the same designs present in your life too is what I have observed and he wants you to handle it with the same grace like he did it , he will not stop until he makes a Skandh out of you and that is why he is not just the Son of Lord Shiva but Sivagurunathan - The Guru of Lord Shiva.
Om Sri Gurubhyo Namah
Om Saravana Bhava 🙏🏻
Jai Maa Adya MahaKali 🌺
- By Swetha Shisya of Gurudev Shri Praveen Radhakrishnan